February 2012
80 posts
Anonymous asked: I miss hearing your voice late nights and early mornings, it's been so long since I've called or you've called but I didn't forget you, i could never forget you. I hear you sometimes, words you've whispered over cellular connections still in my head and in my heart. I'm still waiting deer, to meet you in the coffee shop.
4 tags
Intoxicated
It was morning. I ran my fingers through your hair, thick with sweat. I rested my hand on your clammy forehead just to feel the inconsistent heat emitting from the pores of your skin. Those tired eyelids fluttered open to reveal glazed and bloodshot eyes, naive and unsure of the current surroundings - until you once again felt familiar with my soothing presence. You smiled at me and whispered my...
5 tags
Dear Mr. Wolf,
Do you ever feel incredibly insignificant? Like you’re just the misplaced shards of a shattered mirror that never once reflected the true face of reality? Like you’re just another member of this twisted society; misunderstood and most likely destined to accomplish nothing meaningful? There’s so many faces around you, such a large crowd that you could blend in with - yet you...
2 tags
Let's Skip The Small Talk
I couldn’t stand the way he smiled -
his chapped lips tugging at the corners
of his mouth, and never tugging on the ends
of my heartstrings.
He couldn’t stand the way I laughed -
something about the sound of once lively birds
chirping until their violent death, displeased
his already bleeding ears.
8 tags
Courage
“Would it even matter?” - that’s the question I know you’d ask. That’s the question everyone else will ask, that’s the question I ask myself. The answer is yes - it would matter. Yes, it would matter years from now when I dig under my bed and hesitantly pull out the dusty box containing 812 handwritten letters. Yes, it would matter when I indulge in seasonal...
6 tags
Foolish
Eventually, I will have to realize that my words go unnoticed. I will have to come to terms with the undeniable fact that they are unrequited ink stains, splattered only to cease the voice screaming inside of my head. The voice that lives inside of my heart, the voice that I might have stolen from you. They are words shared to expose the secrets that are buried within me. They are words spoken and...
4 tags
Static
I am static. Trembling all over; weak in the knees and fingertips tracing over the black and blues decorating my arms. My throat is choked up and I’m muttering words that come out in some sort of misunderstood, useless language. All I can hear is your screams filling the air. The rage visibly seen in the darkest depths of your eyes haunts me. I lose my staggering breath when I feel the pace...
3 tags
Guilt
I felt the need to forget your name,
nothing more than letters etched and
traced on a bare back -
the skin canvas that your body is,
art stained beneath each layer of flesh.
I felt the need to forget myself,
the reckless sinner who stole the spark
from within your bright eyes -
mirror irises that reflect tainted innocence,
violated in the most brutal of ways.
I felt the need to...
3 tags
Grudge
I forgave your trespasses of my body;
the perverted endeavors that violently worshiped
each hidden crevice and every sculpted curve,
the tongue that caressed my velvet insides -
and the teeth that nipped at my swollen flesh.
I forgave your trespasses of my soul;
tainting the innocence i preserved from longing -
that longed for more than bitten ear lobes and
lotion stained fingertips...
4 tags
Hot Wax
I can only imagine what it’s like. To never feel real again, to never feel the fire burning the soles of our feet as we flicker like flames in ecstasy. You’ve melted into my beating heart - like hot wax sticking to the surfaces and within each and every crevice. I’ll never dispose of the ashes left, the ashes that remind me I am forgotten. Through this tragedy where I almost lose...
3 tags
Before eleven
There are nights like these where the city screams monotony, mocking me for any ordinary ideals that cross through my thoughts. I gaze idly out the window of a high rise apartment in hopes of catching a shooting star, in hopes of coloring the glimpses of shady faces that flicker from view like brief lights. My feet are sore and my eyes awfully weary, foolishly ignoring the coaxes of satin sheets....
3 tags
Bare
Sometimes, I remember you and you’re not transparent. You’re not so terribly vague; not so fleeting and fearful. When this happens, I lose my breath and feel the harsh thumping in my chest, my heart skipping a beat to remind me of my existence - our existence. I feel the machinery of my mind crash and the balance of my aura blend various shades. I remember the lips that failed to meet...
4 tags
Permission
Your eyes stay sullen; barely expressing the true turmoil draining each breath you take. Barely expressing the colors and shades that make up the fibers of your so-beyond-ordinary being. I’ll search those irises for the light, for the fire burning inside in attempt to melt the frost stained on your dreamer’s decay perception. I’ll search your blurred vision to find who you once...
4 tags
1:19 AM
My eyelids weigh heavily with saturation, tempting me to the entrance that is my solitude. It coaxes me home with promises of retribution - although, all I ever get is another sleepless night without you. How unfortunate we are to differ in one particular sense, especially when it is the same force that brings us together. I’m looking at the clock, imagining how all these seconds passing...
4 tags
Confessions of the Artist
The stars of January mocked me silently, alike those relative strangers wearing fake smiles. I felt so tested, so defeated, I trembled with each breath inhaled and prayed it would be worth it. It flowed through me like an angelic menace, bringing destruction to my veins in the form of my desired savior. I knew I was a fool - relying on the action associated with rush, even as it brought me home to...
4 tags
When it rains
Here I am, listening to the sound of raindrops painting my window. Lightning flashes occasionally and restores the violent spark in my eye - the one stolen with every word spoken from your hushed lips. I’m chewing my late night dinner slowly, practically choking on apathy. How did I become the city loner caged inside of my romantic ideals? Was I always destined to be this way? Why is my...
6 tags
Midnight
Tell me you’ll be here, you’ll be there. When my heels are bruised, and my eyes heavily weary - I will dedicate the remainder of my energy to staining these words with your invisible love. Your broken smile will come to mind and I will remember all the things I never told you. I will remember the little golden box still buried beneath my bed, empty and forgotten because I was robbed...
Anonymous asked: Name one song that holds alot of meaning to you?
3 tags
A question for him.
I laid my head on the pillow to coax my lost dreams. Tell me why I smelled your presence lingering within the cotton fibers? Tossing and turning, I fought the reckless demons that buried their claws into my weak wrists. Mercilessly, they peeled away my flesh - and I want to know why the blood I shed screamed your name, like a song of romantic angst. Fists clenched and fingers trembling, I beckoned...
5 tags
Dear Mr. Wolf,
Days like these I lay in bed a few minutes longer, despite the protests
of the city that is now my home - awakening me with the sounds of fast
paced trains and restless feet gnawing away at the surface of beaten
streets. My eyes aimlessly wander around the lonely room and search for
something other than my azure painted walls. A much wiser willow tree
boasts in it’s undiscovered beauty,...
2 tags
Short and (Bitter)Sweet
i’m sleeping in your place,
trying to remember the look on your face -
when i cooed morning blessings into your ear,
and now all i can say is that i wish you were here i wish you were here.
Anonymous asked: at the edge of the world you will still float.
Anonymous asked: How many letters have you written for him?
Anonymous asked: But still, why directly write him a letter tonight?
Anonymous asked: You wrote a letter to Mr. Wolf, and you haven't been doing that much lately. Why the change?
6 tags
Dear Mr. Wolf,
There’s so much I need to tell you. There’s so many questions, so many answers remaining unanswered. I don’t know how much longer I can bottle this up inside, I don’t know how many kisses need to be faked before this starts to make sense. It’s so painful to live on the edge, thinking that if I fall - it will be into your arms. It’s so painful wishing for your...
3 tags
Home Bound
Right now, half of my heart is on a plane bound for New York. Home sweet home - and I wonder if he has ever felt that way about me. I wonder if he notices the stars shining a little bit more brightly tonight, blessing young lovers torn apart by circumstances. The night sky has stolen me into a trance, I’ve almost forgotten that I am all alone. It feels like sugarcoated angst with a modest...
2 tags
Embers
I loathe the flames dancing on your skin,
the heat emitting from your ember stained kiss -
loving me so deadly; I would be a liar if I said
I never felt this alive.
3 tags
Something.
I rested my head atop yours. I felt your eyelashes flutter against my cheek, and your hand slowly crept up my thigh - sending a wave of shivers across my flushed skin. We laid there, tangled and meshed, with no particular mission in mind to accomplish. It was just quiet, just subtle touches here and there. Nothing more, nothing less. I kind of liked it.
I liked the lack of heavy breaths and...
Anonymous asked: If you tell me you love me I'll give you the world.
4 tags
Dear you,
Tonight was our last night. Your touch showed me Paris, and your kiss brought me Asia. I want nothing more than to hear those breaths once more in the morning before our inevitable farewell destroys the past six days. The afternoon at the park, an evening dinner in the city - it was all too memorable and beautiful for words to describe. I still remember the sparks felt within your hands, the light...
3 tags
If you found me
If you found me, you’d collect all the weathered tears stained on my cheeks. Your caress would linger on the surface of my skin, outlasting the kisses still painted onto my lips. I would hear your voice in the form of echoes - saturating my perception in the depth of your tone. With you, everything would change. It would be the first change I ever wholeheartedly embraced, barely fearful of the...
4 tags
Expressing
I moaned your name. There was no expression on your face. You stared straight through me, your eyes focused on deceiving the depths of seclusion that is my pleasure. I found no solace in those dark irises; relentless and possessing no compassion. You wanted some part of me. You wanted to steal more than my breaths and the occasional thigh caress - and I did nothing to stop you. Your desire was...
3 tags
Blackout
I felt his grip on my waist loosen as he shoved me down onto the couch. The force made my insides sway, I was hooked just as much as I was appalled. When my head hit harshly with a thud, I didn’t expect to feel anything but bruising.
Instead, I felt my vision fade as my conscious awakened. I was somewhere in oblivion where I seemed to have lost everything that mattered at one point - it all...
3 tags
Truth hurts
This song playing - it won’t sound as good ever again. The lyrics so much less witty, the beat farther than far off. It won’t feel right after tonight. I wonder if you notice the way I’m counting the seconds; stealing a glance with every few moments passing. I like how close we can be. I like how close we can be when our minds are so distant; our dreams existing in different realms. As if our...
3 tags
Shame
The soft breeze drenched my senses, coaxing my tired eyelids to open. My bones feel lose but my muscles are still tense. I don’t hear his breathing; where is his presence? I’m trying to find a reason to stay awake. The air tastes a little melancholy, easy on the tongue but swallows slowly. My skin is mocked by fleas - or just tickling goosebumps our warm embrace could cease. Don’t tremble when...
3 tags
Valentines and Casualties
You searched my face, trying to look past my apathetic appearance. Maybe you thought you would have found something in my eyes, memories on rewind or traces of those late night adventures that felt like the definition of everlasting love. Our mutual gaze was held and it was the closest to reassurance needed by the both of us. No spark was ignited, no shivers ran down my spine - it was just a...
3 tags
Fear
Your breath caught fire, exhausting the flames building up within your veins. The heat emitting from my pores steamed the window, fogging up clear vision of our outside surroundings. Neither of us cared. There was something in the way you pressed closer - barely careful in your mission to accomplish me. Skipping the meshed lips seemed fair to the moonlight that gleamed through our irises and...
3 tags
I'll be your anything.
There are moments like these, when falling in love becomes nothing more than a nostalgic presence, silently mocking you. So, desperately, you search and try to find the light in someone’s eyes, anyone for that matter, but all you can see is their blurred vision, and in that sense - you’re not alone. But it’s awfully lonely. Wouldn’t you kill just for a transparent hand to...
3 tags
Fake it
Sometimes, I like to pretend to like you. I can’t find a flaw in the practice of exchanging a cunning persona for a sliver of decency. Other than the obvious fact that, of course, it’s all utterly fake. A devious grin might go unnoticed, but would you really forget the smile I braved for you? Would you really forget the eyelashes that fluttered and tickled your skin? If you were to...
3 tags
History Lesson
Modernism injected itself into the beds of young lovers,
legs entangled within the lust scented sheets still stained
in bourbon and almost ancient wine; drunk on ambition -
to feast on the hunger in the glazed eyes of the infatuated,
whose kisses were haunted by the ghost of vodka; consumed
alike the way the skin absorbs naivety out of the faint heart,
consisting of those trembling veins...
Anonymous asked: What are you scared of?
2 tags
We’re awfully nonchalant,
dead set on falling in love
like fools with nothing to lose
besides our hearts and our
increasingly warped minds.
2 tags
Reflections
I assumed you to be dead;
though your eyes fluttered open
like all those early mornings that
consisted of satin sheet endeavors
and breaths borrowed from the dew of dawn
And you choked out to me,
accusing me a thief for your stolen heart
that appeared to beat within the irises of my eyes,
but I told you that it was just the reflection
of the time bound sunrise.
2 tags
Immortal Meadows
Do you remember that field,
that open stretch of lush greens?
our bodies buried in a bed of weeds,
whose feather like petals tickled our
foreheads and the soles of our bruised feet.
Your love the infinite blue that is the sky,
vast and only vaguely predictable -
briefly noticed like the swollen veins that
pulse beneath my pale flesh; itchy for touch
and adorned in poison ivy stained...
4 tags
2-15
Three days. That’s how long it will be until this anticipation dissolves. I almost wonder if it’s actually disguised fear, blinding me once more. Like the coward that I am. What if I aimlessly discover the truth, and I am unable to further pursue my security blanket dreams? I’d rather drown into the depths of denial, than see the surface that is my reality. Even if the dwelling...
3 tags
Blades and Friction
i’m cold. my feet coax friction with the carpet, burning the soles and tickling the heels. my toes curl, only to bury into the fibers of berber. i don’t like the rustic flecks. they remind me too much of you. uncoordinated, desperate. irrationally attempting to hide the stains of your past, the ones that have been coated in the dust of time. we’re similar in that sense, except...